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Postmark Wonderland

Postmark Wonderland

Coming back from the other side of my Bipolar Wonderland through medication, creativity, and moxie.

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Category: Suicidal

Of Elaboration and Exhaustion

September 18, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,327 Days Alive

72 Requests Logged Today at Work

1 Story Begging to be Written

So. Y’all ought to know by now I am of the witchy persuasion. Kitchen, candle, and divination focused with a dash of just being more crafty than witchcrafty.

Let me explain how pizza is a prosperity spell.

Continue reading “Of Elaboration and Exhaustion” →

Of Pregabalin and Pork Loin

September 16, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,325 Days Alive

2 Meds Picked Up

1st Day of the Full Moon

Well, I finally have my generic Lyrica again. Been out for three days due to shipping fuckery at the pharmacy.

Continue reading “Of Pregabalin and Pork Loin” →

Of Pancakes and Pizza

September 8, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ 1 Comment

14,317 Days Alive

2 Pancakes Eaten

We went to IHOP for lunch today. I behaved, mostly, but I did use sugar free syrup on my two pancakes. I didn’t get the seasonal flavor because it had tons of sugar.

Continue reading “Of Pancakes and Pizza” →

Of Kindness and Kitchen Witchery

August 31, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,309 Days Alive

4 Rows Worked on Clara’s Blanket

1 Pumpkin Cake Not Made today

I really want to make pumpkin bread. I was going to make it this morning, but my body decided I needed more sleep than I did to bake pumpkin bread.

Continue reading “Of Kindness and Kitchen Witchery” →

Of Talk Therapy and Tiramisu

August 30, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,308 Days Alive

9 Minutes that My Therapist Was Late Today

2 Bowls of Zuppa Toscana Consumed

1 Lingering Headache

Heavy stuff herein. Frank discussion of sexual abuse, rape, and the mental trials of surviving both.


Had therapy today. Talked about a lot of the triggers I had flare up this week with my gynecological appointment.

Continue reading “Of Talk Therapy and Tiramisu” →

Of Pulled Pork and Plotting

August 26, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,304 Days Alive

2 Doctor’s Visits Tomorrow

I’ve been writing again. A lot lately, trying to finish plotting out a story.

Continue reading “Of Pulled Pork and Plotting” →

Of Diablo IV and Dearest

August 22, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,300 Days Alive

7 Levels Earned on my Necromancer

1 Temporary Filling

I did it. I went to the dentist this morning at the buttcrack of dawn.

Continue reading “Of Diablo IV and Dearest” →

Of Cracks and Cuddles

August 8, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,286 Days Alive

9 Hour Workday Today

1 Still Cracked Tooth

I have yet to find a dentist that takes my dental insurance. It’s hella fucking annoying.

Continue reading “Of Cracks and Cuddles” →

Of chips and Coping Mechanisms

August 2, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,280 Days Alive

67 Minutes of Initial Therapy Session

1 New Therapist Successfully Met

I’m fried like an over-hard egg straight from the griddle.

Continue reading “Of chips and Coping Mechanisms” →

Of Strength and Spite

July 31, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,278 Days Alive

592 Job Applications Put In

4 Interviews Attended

I’m trying so hard to keep going. But I’m so very tired.

I can at least make it to Friday. I can do that.

Spite don’t fail me now.

Of Perfume and Possibilities

July 24, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,271 Days Alive

6 AM Wakeup Call

I am utterly spent today. Worked through lunch and stayed late.

I’m just going to crawl under my weighted blanket and pass out.

Take your meds, folks.

Of Groceries and Grief

July 14, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,261 Days Alive

4 Mint Oreos Eaten

I am not doing great. We went grocery shopping today and I just… got slammed with a wave of grief.

Continue reading “Of Groceries and Grief” →

Of Spicy Stories and Sriracha Mayo

July 11, 2024 ~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

14,258 Days Alive

6 Bulgogi Beef Mandu Eaten

1 Very Long Day

I’ve been reading a lot lately. Using my Kindle Unlimited subscription for the best reasons. Smut, happily ever after, small town and somehow Canadian stories I can devour in a day and a half.

Continue reading “Of Spicy Stories and Sriracha Mayo” →

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