People think the freedom of speech should be freedom from consequences or that racism is a bygone issue when there are still sundown towns across the country.
I am as free as a canary in a coal mine, screaming a warning, unheeded, for the dangers to come.
Today was a day from hell. Not my story to tell, but suffice it to say Excedrin, caffeine, and sheer adaptability in the face of stress served me well today.
I actually felt the need to consult the Feelings Wheel my prior therapist sent me for this one. I wasn’t sure if curiosity was an option?
While i’m not sure if it’s because I am not by stretch of anyone’s imagination neurotypical, if it’s because I have too much emotional trauma from over the years, or I just keep failing to grasp the differences between the multitudes of emotional states a person can have, I struggle a lot with emotions. Particularly, with identifying what emotion I am feeling. I struggle with expressing and acknowledging negative emotions. for the most part.
However, if I had to pick a positive emotion that I feel the most often it would be curiosity. 
I often find myself trying to avoid the chaos inside my mind. For a mental illness that is supposed “all in my head” or some such utter nonsense that is meant to diminish what I deal with on a regular basis, it sure is pretty potent. In any case, I often have to find external focus points for my brain to reach even a modicum of quiet. Whether it’s dishes or cooking, crocheting or sweeping , or even just playing Tetris, I have to have something for my hands to do.
We were talking about needing a laugh so we were telling each other about our favorite Carol Burnett moments. Mine is the “famous” elephant show blooper.
Write about a random act of kindness you’ve done for someone.
I don’t quite know how to phrase this particular response without sounding self-aggrandizing or prideful.
I am kind because the world is not. I am patient with most people because others are not. I am helpful, compassionate, and empathetic because the world is filled with cruelty.
The only way to make it better is with little acts of kindness.
Everybody wants to save the Earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
I want one of the blue raspberry ice cups we have in the freezer. But it’s not a good choice with it being minutes to midnight right now. So I shall refrain this time.
I am naught but a bit of leftover ash and bone in a pretty little jar on a mantle of a strange kitchen fireplace in Altamonte Springs, Florida.
What once was my body rattles on the mantle as my nieces thunder by on the tile floors. As children are wont to do, those delightful little girls, right now just five and six years old, run like a heard of elephants through the house. As often as they can, they are shrieking in glee and doing most things at maximum volume.
Since human cremains are so high in salt, phosphate, and calcium, while also having a high pH, maybe I’ve been diluted and mixed into the enriched soil beneath the blueberry bushes I convinced my brother to purchase that one trip to Home Depot we took years ago.
In any case, I have shuffled off this mortal coil in this other world. Maybe I have been reborn as a chubby and beloved kitten or a feisty little foal with mischief in my heart. I am gone, but not forgotten. Dead, but not lost to memory, yet.
In another universe, I am but ash in a jar on the mantle of a fireplace.
533 Words Written for This Week’s Discussion Board Post
2 Slices of Pizza for Dinner
1 Ridiculous and Amazing Goodwill Purchase
Well. Today was an absolute shitshow. Just… didn’t sleep well, forgot to post last night’s blog entry before passing out reading, really rough day at work…