Category: Writing

Prompt Answer: Lesson Learned

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

Share a lesson you wish you had learned earlier in life.

Y’all know that phrase that people regurgitate when things go wrong? It doesn’t seem to matter if it’s a stubbed toe, burned dinner, missed bus, or catastrophic accident. People spit out the “well, everything happens for a reason!” Usually with a well-meaning, gentle smile.

It makes me want to throw things.

Technically, everything does happen for a reason, in the literal sense. That reason is that people make choices of all kinds with or without thought to the potential consequences to themselves or others.

Choice: some guy drove home with a blood alcohol of legally dead. Resulting consequences: my grandmother died and he got a scant eleven years in prison.

Choice: my abusers hurt me. Consequences: I have complex post-traumatic stress disorder and a hatred of bodily fluids.

Choice: I chose to make the best choice for myself and leave Indiana. Consequence: I now live in Wisconsin and am happier than I have maybe ever been.

Everything doesn’t always have a reason beyond chance. Nothing is for certain. But that doesn’t mean that we avoid trying to make better choices when presented the opportunity.

I wish I learned that “everything happens for a reason” is simply someone usually trying to express “I’m sorry this is happening to you, I don’t know why, or how to necessarily help, but I care”.

Prompt Answer: Doing This Evening

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

What are you doing this evening?

I am finishing up cleaning up our lovely dinner of salad and chicken nuggets before hitting the books in my two courses this five week term: biology and college math.

I am low-key terrified because I’ve always been told I am a mathematical moron. I don’t agree, but Indo agree that number flip around on me sometimes (thanks, dyscalculia! Not really. Fucking hell it sucks.)

Prompt Answer: Red Flags

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

What personality trait in people raises a red flag with you?

The biggest red flag that someone could wave for me is a lack of empathy. That’s it. That’s the heart of it for me. If I have to explain to you that you should care about your planet, fellow humans, or other living creatures, I’m out. If you cannot be a decent human being for the sake of being a decent human being, you have no place in my life.

Prompt Answer: Why Blog?

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

Why do you blog?

I am going to answer this in typical Theo fashion: in a round about way.

I grew up lonely in a crowd of people who overlooked me so thoroughly, so completely. They never seemed to see me. Instead, they saw how I could be useful to them. It wasn’t until I was older that I realized I came from a household that never truly had a chance in hell to be whole or balanced or not broken.

I am the child of several very complicated people. Flawed, broken, human people who made mistakes and had their small victories. Whether I want to or not, I live on in the wake of their deaths, some of them. For the living, I strive on in hopes of seeing them again soon.

I blog because I am a fantastically flawed human being who strives to leave the world a little better in their wake. I blog so maybe, someday, I won’t be forgotten as soon as I return to dust. I blog to be seen, hear, and see and hear others in turn.

I blog for myself, for you and any other person I can call friend.

L