I actually felt the need to consult the Feelings Wheel my prior therapist sent me for this one. I wasn’t sure if curiosity was an option?
While i’m not sure if it’s because I am not by stretch of anyone’s imagination neurotypical, if it’s because I have too much emotional trauma from over the years, or I just keep failing to grasp the differences between the multitudes of emotional states a person can have, I struggle a lot with emotions. Particularly, with identifying what emotion I am feeling. I struggle with expressing and acknowledging negative emotions. for the most part.
However, if I had to pick a positive emotion that I feel the most often it would be curiosity. 
I often find myself trying to avoid the chaos inside my mind. For a mental illness that is supposed “all in my head” or some such utter nonsense that is meant to diminish what I deal with on a regular basis, it sure is pretty potent. In any case, I often have to find external focus points for my brain to reach even a modicum of quiet. Whether it’s dishes or cooking, crocheting or sweeping , or even just playing Tetris, I have to have something for my hands to do.
Write about a random act of kindness you’ve done for someone.
I don’t quite know how to phrase this particular response without sounding self-aggrandizing or prideful.
I am kind because the world is not. I am patient with most people because others are not. I am helpful, compassionate, and empathetic because the world is filled with cruelty.
The only way to make it better is with little acts of kindness.
Everybody wants to save the Earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
Well, they have changed since last I answered this question. Now that I’m living in Wisconsin, travelling to Illinois to see the mess of siblings and other assorted, vaguely related people that I hold dear is in the list.
Mitsuwa Market in Arlington Heights, Illinois and Chicago’s Chinatown are also on the travel list.
I’d love to finally be able to coordinate that trip with Reffie, maybe eventually visit Uncle Gator and family after they get settled in their new place. Oh! And go to Salem, Massachusetts! Not during October, because fuck that many people around. But maybe late fall/early spring?
I’d love to go to the ridiculous and apparently delicious all-you-can-eat themed dinner theater thing called Sneaky Pete’s Wild West Dinner Show. It has been added to the household bucket list.
I also would love to get out of the USA at some point soon. Probably not to leave-leave? Hit definitely get somewhere a little less hellscape.
Our main printer broke and our secondary one kept jamming. It was a rough two and a half to three hours of stress and hurry up just to wait some more. I usually love my desk, because it’s a standing desk that I have a tall chair for in case I need to sit. But today I was up and down trying to help them get either printer working before the repair technician showed up.
I was already struggling with my pain levels before I did the deck chair Hokey Pokey. Now, my pain levels are through the fucking roof. I threw up both breakfast and lunch today. I legitimately thought I was going to pass out at one point, because I had to take a bunch of deep breaths. I just sat the fuck down in the middle of the hallway near the bathrooms because I was just… out of it. My ears were ringing, my vision went spotty, and I thought I was going to throw up again. It wasn’t a headaches my butt would have gone to the ER. But it was like my usual full ache was dialed up to eleven.
Between this fibromyalgia flare up, the left hip bursitis, my white blood cell count being up to 10.4 K/ul (down from 12.67 in February where fuck if anyone knew why it was that high), my PCOS giving me double trouble for the last three months in a row, and my anemia kicking my ass it’s a wonder I can get out of bed.
I’m so tired of being in pain. I’m so weary. Hopefully my new treatment team will be of better help to me than my previous one.
Goodness knows I have a better, if still small, support system right now.
I am bothered by the basic lack of compassion, kindness, and understanding in those that claim to be followers of Christ.
Why? Because they claim he died for their sins, but are unrepentant in acts of horrific cruelty to their fellow man.
Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” ~ Matthew 22:37-40
Both to yourself and to others: be kind, be patient, and have compassion for those who struggle.
Now, I may be a Jewish-born pagan, but Jesus was a Jew, too. I strive to live a good life, regardless of my pantheon. I wish to leave behind a legacy of kindness, compassion, and a little bit of laughter.
Do you know what genuinely gets better with age? Adventure. Big ones to other countries or other states! Little ones to the grocery store with a dear one!
I am fairly certain I have already answered this, but I’m going to update, change, or otherwise amend my response. My favorite thing about myself is my ability to change and remain kind. Compassion and adaptability.
I previously answered that my tagline would be “yarn-addled”. Right now, however, I think it would be “remarkably resilient, possibly unfortunately so”.
Postmark Wonderland 