Coming back from the other side of my Bipolar Wonderland through medication, creativity, and moxie.
13,025 Days Alive
I’m… still not okay. I don’t have the spoon to go into it much, but suffice it to say that I’m terrified I’m going to lose my job. And by extension my place or live and car and everything.
I just don’t have a lot of fight left in me.
I’m going to bed.
Take your meds , folks.
13,022 Days Alive
Fair warning: heavy topics hereafter: it has been brought to my attention that being actively suicidal means my meds aren’t working. I thought it was something wrong with me. I’m not unhappy, per se, at least not more than usual. I mean, I’ve even had some good days recently.
Continue reading “Of Appointments and Apathy”
13,018 Days Alive
3 Days of Migraine
1 Nauseous Me
I left work early today. I didn’t throw up in the trash can at work again, but it was a near thing. I did end up pain-puking when I got home and knocked out after a second dose of imatrex for almost three hours today.
Continue reading “Of Nausea and Nachos”
13,015 Days Alive
1 Hour Without Power at Work
Today was fantastically frustrating. We lost power just after lunch today. Not for too long, but long enough to be annoying and to throw off my whole day.
Continue reading “Of Brownouts and Blankets”
13,009 Days Alive
I get my first dose of the COVID-19 vaccine tomorrow. I’m not looking forward to it as I’m always afraid of having bad reactions to shots.
But I’ll power through.
Continue reading “Of Immunizations and Illness”
13,004 Days Alive
3 Crying Jags
2 Soft Tacos
1 Road Trip to Take Tomorrow
Today was a bad day. For reasons I don’t want to talk about, I had a massive panic attack at work today. Like, dry heaving into the wastebasket, crying uncontrollably, unable to breathe for way too long panic attack.
Continue reading “Of Crying and Coffee”
12,999 Days Alive
521 Day Streak On Duolingo
6 Skeins of Colors for Meg’s Blanket
4 Loads of Laundry Done
2 Slices of Bacon and Onion Pizza
1 Finished Blanket for Little Bee
I had a massive headache this morning. So I put on my second favorite Hayao Miyazaki film, Howl’s Moving Castle. I found out that I don’t own Spirited Away!
Continue reading “Of Miyazaki and Munchies”
12,996 Days Alive
2 Burritos Eaten
1 Movie Watched
1/2 A Round Completed on Little Bee’s Blanket
I’m still working on Little Bee’s blanket. I’m still eleven rows + the border from done. I’m not sure the border I’m going to do yet, but it’ll be nice. And hopefully done in the next week or so.
Continue reading “Of Cartoons and Crafting”
12,988 Days Alive
1,835 Words on ‘Prosperity in Pizza’ Short Story
50 Emails Handled Today at Work
I am officially writing again! I’m also really fighting what I think is the downturn of this most recent manic moment.
Continue reading “Of Work and Writing”
12,986 Days Alive
508 Day Streak on Duolingo
2 Tacos Eaten
1 Don Bluth Film Watched
So, we watched the absolutely ridiculous film, Jupiter Rising, this evening; Fen, their girlfriend Kimmy, and I.
And then, to recover some brain power afterwards, we turned to an old classic, circa 1994, that Fen and I hadn’t seen in a while and that Kimmy had never seen.
It was tacos for dinner tonight. Low spoons means low effort meal. They put on the MST3K of Outlaw on after that, so I retired to my room. I’ve no desire to see anything based on The Books of Gor. Reading them was more than enough.
I just read a short story that was a little Purge-like called Little Monsters: A Halloween Story. It’s got an odd, emotionally detached narrator but it was engaging. Wouldn’t read it again, but it was enjoyable.
I’m going to meditate and then crash for the night.
Take your meds, folks.
12,984 Days Alive
So, Fen bought us Korean BBQ for dinner tonight. I tried kimchi. I wasn’t a fan. But I loved the bulgogi beef they had.
Continue reading “Of Bulgogi and Books”
12,982 Days Alive
2 Plates of Nachos
1 Finished Book
There’s always something a little jarring about finishing reading a book. Detaching one’s self from the fictional world and stepping back into the “real” world.
Continue reading “Of Mermaids and Melancholy”
12,981 Days Alive
3 Cookie Dough Flautas Eaten
1 Episode of BBC’s Sherlock Watched
Today was… overwhelming. Work was again super stressful. It’s only Tuesday but man am I looking forward to the weekend. Tomorrow will be a better day, I’m sure of it.
Continue reading “Of Sherlock and Stress”
Postmark Wonderland 