Tag: Bipolar 1

Swimmingly Saturday

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,363 Days Alive

7,622 Books to Read

1,677 Steps Taken

2 Hours in the Pool

1 Project Restarted

I’m a little emotionally exhausted today, so I’m going to be brief:

I spent about two hours at the pool. I’m exhausted. I restarted DW’s Blanket again, but I’m happy with it this time.

Good night.

Thrown Off Balance

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ 1 Comment

12,354 Days Alive

Today is one of those days where nothing has gone quite right.

It’s exhausting and anxiety inducing as hell. I get paid tomorrow, but my entire paycheck is going to be decimated by bills and gas and medication costs.

I can’t seem to get ahead.

And apparently that’s my own fault. I don’t make as much as my housemates. And my attempts at finding side work has thus far been not as successful as I hoped.

Things will improve. I just have to work harder and more and pray I don’t burn out.

I’m going to bed.

Weird, Wonderful Wednesday

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,353 Days Alive

7,364 Books to Read

16 Hours Awake and Counting

5 Sunflowers

1 Strange Accomplishment

Did y’all know I’m a recovered vegetarian? While I was homeless, or in a state of weird mental spiral, I exerted what control I could over my life, mainly, by not eating meat. And after the thing with the chickens, I couldn’t eat bone in without nausea and disgust.

Continue reading “Weird, Wonderful Wednesday” →

Hello, new followers!

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

This was supposed to be the 200th post, but I was punched in the face by a migraine that day and kind of just…didn’t happen.

I’m over fifty followers so I just wanted to do a quick shout out to everyone who reads Postmark Wonderland!

If ever you want to reach out, I’m available at TheodoraVanyar@gmail.com, TheoVanyar on Twitter, or you can leave a comment on a post. I’m super responsive to any and all comments, or try very hard to do so.

The reason I started this blog, originally, was because I was mega-super pissed about being diagnosed with type 1 Bipolar Disorder. I mean, I was crying in the parking lot, losing sleep for weeks on end angry. So I started Postmark Wonderland on the 25 September, 2018 Since then, I’ve been blogging at least once a day since 1 October. As of today, that’s 202 days straight and 208 days since diagnosis. My medications have been adjusted three times since 25 September and I think we’re close to finally finding a good balance for at least the Bipolar Disorder.

With the newest adjustment, I’m not suicidal for the first time in over two years. I can’t express how remarkable that feels. I still need to get a therapist. I think I can finally make it a priority.

Since 208 days ago, this blog has also taken on a few other rolls. It’s a recipe sharing device, a reading challenge holder, a writing challenge dump spot, a craft progress tracker, and a book review blog. Since reading, writing, and crafting are three of my main coping mechanisms, they are still rather relevant to the overall core of Postmark Wonderland: helping me find my way to a new normal, a better normal with positive coping mechanisms and good mental health.

I’ll continue to blog for as long as I am able. I’ll continue to use PostmarkWonderland.blog as long as I can afford it. And I’m always happy to hear the stories of others. All we are, as people, are the stories we hold dear.

I’ve got the jabberwocky subdued for now. Now it’s time to head down the unmarked path and see what the new normal is going to be.

Tuesday

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,245 Days Alive

7,341 Books to Read

2,138 Steps Taken

7 on the Pain Scale

An unspecified number of jellybeans counted

For some reason, my pain level is hovering at a low seven. I’ve taken all my meds, but it feels like my joints are stuffed with glass again.

I’m going to bed. Maybe tomorrow will be better.