13,037 Days Alive
4 Tacos Eaten
I’m tired. I’m still adjusting to the new med and my caffeine dependence is going strong.
I don’t have anything to say today.
Take your meds, folks.
Of Tacos and Tiredness
Category: After Work
Of Prescriptions and Princesses
13,033 Days Alive
3 Cookie Dough Flautas Eaten
2 New Prescriptions
1 Long Day
My arm still hurts like the dickens from my COVID vaccination. But I’m not noticing any ill effects from it otherwise. Except being more tired than usual, but that would be lack of sleep.
Continue reading “Of Prescriptions and Princesses”Of Shots and Sleeping
13,032 Days Alive
I went to bed over an hour ago. I’m still not asleep. I know I’m tired. I even took meds to sleep. My arm is a little sore from where they gave me my second Covid vaccine shot.
Continue reading “Of Shots and Sleeping”Of Tears and Tacos
13,031 Days Alive
I had my meds doctor appointment today. I was honest about how much I’m struggling and how suicidal I am.
Continue reading “Of Tears and Tacos”Of Chicken and Calling
13,029 Days Alive
I actually feel like I did well at work today. I did a lot of calls, I think, and I didn’t cry in my car after work. Even had the spoons to make dinner when I got home despite being exhausted.
Continue reading “Of Chicken and Calling”Of Paranoia and Paranorman
13,026 Days Alive
Today was awful and I don’t want to talk about it. The highlight of my day was watching the Lakia film Paranorman.
Continue reading “Of Paranoia and Paranorman”Of Struggles and Silence
13,025 Days Alive
I’m… still not okay. I don’t have the spoon to go into it much, but suffice it to say that I’m terrified I’m going to lose my job. And by extension my place or live and car and everything.
I just don’t have a lot of fight left in me.
I’m going to bed.
Take your meds , folks.
Of Spaghetti and Suicidal Thoughts
13,024 Days Alive
1 Bowl of Pasta Eaten
I’m more exhausted than a NASCAR tailpipe right now, and I’m fried from work, so I’ll be quick.
I’m really, really in a dark place right now. I’m having trouble with the mental radio.
I’m not okay. But I’m going to do my best to power through this down slide.
I’m going to go cry myself to sleep.
Take your meds, folks.
Of Pills and Pain Levels
13,023 Days Alive
15 Hour Day
2 Slices of Cake Eaten
I’ve been up since six am. Relatively okay, actually. I got done what I aimed to do this work day and mostly relaxed after work.
Continue reading “Of Pills and Pain Levels”Of Appointments and Apathy
13,022 Days Alive
Fair warning: heavy topics hereafter: it has been brought to my attention that being actively suicidal means my meds aren’t working. I thought it was something wrong with me. I’m not unhappy, per se, at least not more than usual. I mean, I’ve even had some good days recently.
Continue reading “Of Appointments and Apathy”Of Nausea and Nachos
13,018 Days Alive
3 Days of Migraine
1 Nauseous Me
I left work early today. I didn’t throw up in the trash can at work again, but it was a near thing. I did end up pain-puking when I got home and knocked out after a second dose of imatrex for almost three hours today.
Continue reading “Of Nausea and Nachos”Of Groceries and Going Forward
13,016 Days Alive
5 Jalapeño Poppers Eaten
2 Grocery Stores Visited
1 Slightly Exhausted Me
There are times where I feel if I stop moving, if I slow down, if I freeze up, I’ll keel over. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s a form of mania? I’m honestly not sure. Whatever it is, it’s exhausting. Utterly taxing.
Continue reading “Of Groceries and Going Forward”Of Brownouts and Blankets
13,015 Days Alive
1 Hour Without Power at Work
Today was fantastically frustrating. We lost power just after lunch today. Not for too long, but long enough to be annoying and to throw off my whole day.
Continue reading “Of Brownouts and Blankets”
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