Category: Mental Health

Weekend Worries

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,220 Days Alive

7,169 Books To Read

5,375 Steps Taken Today

So, I’m kind of in emotional shutdown right now. Hiatus from actual feeling.

There’s just the over my head overwhelmed exhausted bullshit.

I just have to keep going.

Empty Cup

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,218 Days Alive

105 Days Since Daddy’s Death

1 Psych Appointment

I went to the psychologist today; got a new prescription for Abilify that couldn’t be filled until tomorrow.

I feel like…an avocado someone scooped out to make guacamole with. Wrung out. Exhausted.

I reached out to a few people today. Most with success. But now I need to try to sleep because I am bone deep levels of tired.

Take your meds, folks.

Tortillas, Television, and Tired

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,216 Days Alive

7,044 Books to Read

16 Freshly Made Tortilla Chips

I’m… not doing okay. But I’m here.

Still crocheting. I’ve read two books so far today. And managed a culinary undertaking in making keto friendly tortilla chips.

So I’m going to go crochet a bit more before bed.

Take your meds folks.

Sleep, Shopping, and Some Spirits!

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,215 Days Alive

6,754 Books To Read

14 Days Until I Meet Baby Bubble

4 Books I Need to Remember to Review

3 Frog and Restart Sessions

1 Entire Digorno Pizza Consumed

I officially said my final fair well to carbohydrate consumption in great amounts today. I start the ketogenic diet fully in the morning. Why?

Because I know I can do it. I want to do it. And for fuck’s sake, I am tired of being fat.

***Trigger warning for content: I am going to discuss my being a rape survivor in this entry.***

Continue reading “Sleep, Shopping, and Some Spirits!” →

Headache on Hump Day

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,211 Days Alive

2,526 Yards is Yarn to Make into a Blanket

1 Migraine

Not doing great brain wise, so this will be brief. Starting the blanket for my niece, Baby Bubble, tonight. Basic pattern is here.

Hung out with Amy, at our place. Watched the first episode of Umbrella Academy.

I’m in need of sleep. G’night folks. Take your meds.

Insomnia Interlude 10

~ Theodora Vanyar ~ Leave a comment

12,209 Days Alive

It’s my own fault I’m awake. I should not have napped for three hours this afternoon. But I literally lost functional Brian power because I was so tired.

I’ve taken my meds. I’ve eaten dinner, twice if you count the frozen meal.

I need to pick up more low-spoon meals. Like some damn veggie crumbles and make a mess of taco meat with them. And just have frozen taco meat to add to eggs or a salad or into a low carb quesadilla.

That’s a good plan. A mix of meat and not-meat pre-made taco meat. Maybe I can make myself a meal plan?

Something to make sure I actually eat. It is far too easy to feel like I don’t deserve it.

Thank goodness for friends like my Darling Wife, J, Eli, and Tink. They can tempt me with food when I don’t feel like existing.