Days alive: 12,158.2
Weird Starbucks monstrosity had: 1
Mistakes made: many
Creepy ex’s dealt with: 1
Hours slept: about 4.5
I can’t sleep. It’s three in the morning and I’ve been awake for about an hour. And sleeping fitfully before that. Today, yesterday I mean, just wasn’t a great day. It wasn’t dead in the family terrible, but it was pretty difficult.
I was supposed to have therapy and a follow up with Dr. B. Financially, I was unprepared for an unexpected expense. My own fault. I should have, could have asked for help. But didn’t. And now I have to reschedule. Which I will do when I am able.
My stalker ex reached out again. I blocked them after trying yet again to get them to leave me alone. Again. I get so tired of their hateful ways. Very much a “screw this, I’m pulling a Dante and putting them into fiction”. It’s nothing divine nor so hellish (heh, a joke), but it will be my petty revenge nonetheless. And should their actions continue, I’m going for a restraining order.
I need to get better at budgeting. Maybe I’ll ask Chele for help. Or my brother, Duckie. He and his wife Bubbles are expecting a Tiny Bubble in February (congratulations, y’all!) and are well used to budgeting for success. Or I could ask Steph for more help. Maybe try the cash-only for fun money? It doesn’t help that I have student loans, medical debt, and medications I don’t truly know the monthly cost for at the moment. Since I’ve been using the flexible spending account, it has kind of skewed my perspective of cost reality.
I did treat myself to Starbucks today, courtesy of my wife. Five dollars and change for a blended creme Frappuccino with a few pumps of sugar free cinnamon dolce syrup. Mmmm. Spent some time crocheting, story plotting. And then went to dinner with my Darling Wife. Nachos make every day better. Doubly so when we have one of our favorite servers to take care of us.
I miss cooking, though. I know we can’t afford it right now, but I wish we had our own place. I miss making meals with my wife. I miss cooking. We’ll get there. But it’s hard to be patient some times.
I’m gearing up for NaNoWriMo still, trying to get some research done. And finish a fanfic. Hopefully that’ll be done soon.
It’s about two hours before my alarm goes off. I don’t know if I’ll get more sleep because Peanut is being a pillow stealing jerk face.
I’m going to try and get another hour or so of sleep.