Of Achievement and (Possible) Arrhythmia

13,320 Days Alive

835 Days Straight on Duolingo

8.6 A1C

1 Possible Cardiac Issue

Trigger warning: discussion of sexual assault survival.

So. I went to the doctor today. Good news: I lost three pounds, my A1C is down to 8.6 from eleven point something. Bad news: I may have to do without caffeine and other stimulants like my Adderall due the possibility of an arrhythmia.

More tests will tell. I’m going to stick with adderall and cut down my caffeine. I’ve almost eliminated the caffeine pills from my day-to-day life. So that’s something I have to investigate with a whole bunch of fucking doctor visits.

I also have to get a transvaginal ultrasound to see if Percy the Endometrial Polyp has gotten bigger. My doctor ran tests for a hormone panel, so I should hear the results from that in a few days to a week.

The mere thought of having transvaginal anything has me anywhere from shaky and mildly nauseated to dry heaving in the bathroom while I was at work and shaking so hard I could hardly stand up. So, that’s going to take a fucking Xanax or something to deal with. As a sexual assault survivor, even the thought of being penetrated by a foreign object is greatly distressing. Even if it’s in the name of medicine or health or whatever. It’s horrifying. I can barely stand to get an annual exam from a gynecologist. It’s super got me fucked up.

Work was a train wreck. I’m still behind, I’m working on catching up, though. Tomorrow will be productive. I hope.

In other news, I’m working on the final border of Grandma’s Raspberry Lemonade Blanket! It’s edged in the same pink and yellow it’s made in.

I’m exhausted in more ways than one.

I’m going to bed.

Take your meds, folks.

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