12,844 Days Alive
365 Day Streak on Duolingo
1 Tough Therapy Session
Today was rough. I had my therapy appointment with Vickie today. Made it all the way through without breaking down crying.
Which, honestly, shocked me.
We focused mostly on how emotionally overwhelmed I’ve been feeling and how I’ve been struggling with suicidal urges despite the medication I’m on.
Makes me want to poke my brain with a Q-tip. “C’mon you useless sack of hallucinating bacon! Make with the happy chemicals already!”
I don’t want to go over it again, honestly, but let it be known that I got comfort tacos with Fen after my session.
I still don’t like telehealth. But I do see the advantages it permits in this time of COVID-19 craziness.
My dysphoria is kicking up again, too. Which likely means a heavy bleed is heading my way. Stupid, bloody uterus. Stupid endometrial polyp. At least I have the chocolate that Reffie gave me in case of cravings.
It wasn’t an all-bad day.
I feel mighty accomplished having stuck with something like Duolingo for a year, even if I switched languages recently from Spanish to Esperanto. I have more fun learning it.
Also, I got more work done on Sparrow’s Seaside Blanket today.
I’ve been plugging away at this blanket for only a week now. I might have it done by the end of September at this rate!
Anyway. I’m going to go meditate for a bit and then go to bed. I’m physically and emotionally exhausted right now, even with the brain numbing loveliness of season one Star Trek: The Next Generation having been this evening’s entertainment.
Take your meds, folks.