14,546 Days Alive
6,876 Days Since I Stopped Drinking Alcohol
64 Minutes Spent Texting 988 Today
20 Days of this Fucking Headache
7 Days Till Spock’s 15th Birthday
1 Hour Till Payday
I’m still here. I’m suicidal but safe. No plan. Not enough energy to do anything anyway. Did therapy today. Lots of Big Emotions. But I’m still here.
The bad news: I am not doing well right now; mentally or emotionally. I am in a lot of pain. Like, a six and a half over the last four days. The headache is unrelenting. The anemia is getting worse despite me taking vitamins, hydrating, resting, etc. my discomfort level is at a solid eight. Waking to sleep, I am in pain and lot of discomfort.
The good news: I was approved yesterday for my iron infusion since I can’t tolerate taking oral iron. The scheduling hospital is right around the corner from work. My appointment is Friday next, the second of May. Spock turns 15 the day before. I’ve got a 102% in my first class. My next classes start Monday evening.
I’m super tired. Couldn’t even get myself to cook today, I was so exhausted. Crying, emotional crap, and being left alone for almost two hours at the end of the day so my coworker to be able to run an errand was exhausting, too.
I might buy myself a bagel for breakfast tomorrow. For now, sleep, perchance to dream.
Take your meds, folks.
Postmark Wonderland 