14,734 Days Alive
5 Hours of Sleep
11 Subpoenas Drafted for Work
1 Possible Contract Job
Today was one of those days where I stayed up far too late last night. I mean, I was still awake at 6:27 AM. And I don’t know why. I just couldn’t get my brain to shut off.
Once I actually fell asleep, I slept well enough, I suppose. But I only got about four and a half or five hours of sleep. I mean, I don’t think today is gonna be any easier to fall asleep. Even though I woke up tired, have been tired pretty much all day, and have medicated, meditated, and made my bed super comfy for myself, I don’t think I’m gonna fall asleep before three am. Sad but true.
Once I was awake, I just wasn’t happy about it. I woke up in pain. My hands have hurt all day and the mix of steroid cream and arthritis gel I have been using to try and help my hands still burns like a bitch because my skin is cracked. the odd word in today’s blog title is a word with a Welsh history. It basically translates to uncomfortably numb, cold hands. Hilariously apropos as I completely forgot to wear my compression gloves today.
I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I’m just…. Not having a great October. My mental health is drowning in the metaphorical deep end. I am still negative in the bank. Thanks to Uncle Comic, and the local food pantries here, we’re not starving. I still worry about food, instability, and the cost of my medications. That’s a completely valid concern, though considering I don’t currently have health insurance.
Anyway, we started talking about what we want to do for the winter holidays. Apparently, the accidental tradition of making super bizarre and filling charcuterie boards is also known as a “plowman‘s lunch“. I had no idea. Kinda love it, kind of love that Lucian and Brian tend to do the same thing.
I think I need to try to get to the library either today or tomorrow because I have not left the house for anything other than bringing in groceries since Tuesday of last week
I know that this time of year can be very rough for some, especially if you’ve lost someone in the coming holiday season area. It can put a real damper on enjoyment of holidays. I anticipate December fourth, Daddy‘s death anniversary, will be super difficult for me. However, it’s not completely awful right now.
My darling J’s birthday is on Friday; J and Bill6’s 10th wedding anniversary is also Friday. There’s no way in hell that the card I got them is going to get to them in time. None of the Halloween cards are going to get anywhere by Friday because I mislaid them. Oh well. Better late than never. At least I have really cool stamps.
I’m going to try and get some sleep. Hopefully I won’t be a sadsack tomorrow.
Take your meds, folks.
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